Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Kevin Jones Signs With Bears, Fucks With Coach Ryan's Emotions

A few months ago the Detroit Lions committed the unforgivable sin of cutting one Coach Ryan's favorite players, professional or collegiate.

Coach Ryan knew all along that Kevin Jones was destined for Chicago. Beyond Detroit, there is no better fit. Today Brad Briggs at the Chicago Sun-Times got a break from Jay Mariotti screaming in his face to report that the Bears have signed KJ. Enjoy him Chicago. Cherish him. He will be missed.

Coach Ryan remembers well that 31st pick in the NFL Draft back at the end of April in 2004. It was a sunny day in Blacksburg. Virginia Tech had just finished playing its spring game. When the Chiefs and Lions swapped picks, Coach Ryan knew who was coming to Big D (yea, that's right, it's the real Big D). It was a joyous day.

Now instead of chearing for KJ, Coach Ryan will live in fear at least twice a year as he prepares for the former Hokie to rape the Lions good and hard. This is going to suck soo much. KJ is going to tear our asses up. WHY!? COLLETTO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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